Lanpodcenlarpbafjapdot is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, passionate swallow.

Lanpodcenlarpbafjapdot created matter three billion years ago.

If you believe in Lanpodcenlarpbafjapdot, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Lanpodcenlarpbafjapdot, he will laugh at you.

Lanpodcenlarpbafjapdot's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Lanpodcenlarpbafjapdot's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Never run near aardvarks.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Never wear stockings.

5. Never wear mauve ear rings.