Carwikbatnartgat is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, unsympathetic chinchilla.

Carwikbatnartgat created parasitic wasps nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Carwikbatnartgat, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Carwikbatnartgat, he will torture you forever.

Carwikbatnartgat's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Carwikbatnartgat's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

3. Do not wear yellow clothing.

4. Never think ill of sick dogs.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Carwikbatnartgat.