Fasjarnhig is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, dishonourable newt.

Fasjarnhig created the Small Magellanic Cloud three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fasjarnhig, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Fasjarnhig, it will have a low opinion of you.

Fasjarnhig's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Fasjarnhig's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Never skip in the presence of capybaras.

3. Always help tortoises.

4. Put Fasjarnhig first in all things.

5. Respect your elders.