Zensomart Tarwotgem is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, selfish hyena.

Zensomart Tarwotgem created water five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zensomart Tarwotgem, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Zensomart Tarwotgem, it will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Zensomart Tarwotgem's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Zensomart Tarwotgem's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Zensomart Tarwotgem loves horses, so they must be honoured.

4. Worship no other gods but Zensomart Tarwotgem.

5. Always make sure there are no sheep in a room before entering it.