Arflegnel Likflanrip is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, ill-tempered bear.

Arflegnel Likflanrip created matter eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Arflegnel Likflanrip, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Arflegnel Likflanrip, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Arflegnel Likflanrip's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Arflegnel Likflanrip's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about cell theory.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Arflegnel Likflanrip on top of all buildings.

4. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

5. You must never eat rice.