Pasgumrag is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, confident spider.

Pasgumrag created the Sun eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pasgumrag, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Pasgumrag, it will turn you into a tree.

Pasgumrag's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Pasgumrag's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat melons.

2. Never think about gravity.

3. Do not dye your hair fawn.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Always stare at clouds.