Hamwongudbum is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, smart seal.

Hamwongudbum created an electron eight million years ago.

If you believe in Hamwongudbum, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Hamwongudbum, he will jump up and down on your head.

Hamwongudbum's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Hamwongudbum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Never write about amino acids.

4. Always help mice in need.

5. Do not trade with those who eat peanuts.