Cuncangep is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, temperamental cow.

Cuncangep created the Milkyway eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cuncangep, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Cuncangep, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Cuncangep's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Cuncangep's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Worship no other gods but Cuncangep.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not cook food in pots.