Yattfaddim is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, boastful salamander.

Yattfaddim created the Milkyway two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yattfaddim, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Yattfaddim, he will jump up and down on your head.

Yattfaddim's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Yattfaddim's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Do not speak about tomatoes.

3. Run away if seven bats approach from the east.

4. Do not shave your arms.

5. Put Yattfaddim first in all things.