Hugtailtarp is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, ill-tempered centaur.

Hugtailtarp created the Small Magellanic Cloud five million years ago.

If you believe in Hugtailtarp, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Hugtailtarp, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Hugtailtarp's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Hugtailtarp's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat peas.

2. Hugtailtarp loves great tits, so they must be respected.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Hugtailtarp.

4. Do not laugh in public.

5. Always help goats.