Sograwloop is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, uncaring squid.

Sograwloop created Europe eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sograwloop, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Sograwloop, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Sograwloop's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Sograwloop's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Do not kill ants.

4. Never think ill of sick geese.

5. Never look at black holes.