Nulparkfat is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, loving dingo.

Nulparkfat created the Tadpole Galaxy eight million years ago.

If you believe in Nulparkfat, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Nulparkfat, he will boil you in a big pot.

Nulparkfat's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Nulparkfat's Holy Commandments

1. Never sit in holy places.

2. Do not sing in public.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Never look at planets.

5. Do not kill pigs.