Wignurtsakpogwadpidged is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, self-assured manatee.

Wignurtsakpogwadpidged created a bottom quark three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wignurtsakpogwadpidged, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Wignurtsakpogwadpidged, he will turn you into a rat.

Wignurtsakpogwadpidged's most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Wignurtsakpogwadpidged's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Do not eat tomatoes.

3. Always help sick tapirs.

4. Never think about asteroids.

5. Always make sure there are no geese in a building before entering it.