Jabquimbab is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, quiet dryad.

Jabquimbab created the cosmos five million years ago.

If you believe in Jabquimbab, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Jabquimbab, she will curse you with boils.

Jabquimbab's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Jabquimbab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your head.

2. Never hurt squirrels.

3. Never eat melons.

4. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

5. Never wear turquoise rings.