Bellvintim Hinbonkmif Cabhondoss is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, selfish cow.

Bellvintim Hinbonkmif Cabhondoss created snails eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bellvintim Hinbonkmif Cabhondoss, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Bellvintim Hinbonkmif Cabhondoss, she will turn you into a giant slug.

Bellvintim Hinbonkmif Cabhondoss' most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Bellvintim Hinbonkmif Cabhondoss' Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Bellvintim Hinbonkmif Cabhondoss' priests.

2. Never go into brown rooms.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Bellvintim Hinbonkmif Cabhondoss.

4. Retreat if four birds approach from the south.

5. Do not listen to music.