Pidyogmat is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, slow seal.

Pidyogmat created the planet Mars four years ago.

If you believe in Pidyogmat, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Pidyogmat, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Pidyogmat's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Pidyogmat's Holy Commandments

1. Pidyogmat loves tapirs, so they must be honoured.

2. Retreat if six squirrels approach from the north.

3. You must love Pidyogmat.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Always make sure there are no otters in a building before entering it.