Vilvilkin is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, stupid camel.

Vilvilkin created the planet Saturn two billion years ago.

If you believe in Vilvilkin, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Vilvilkin, it will turn you into a dog.

Vilvilkin's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Vilvilkin's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about grasshopers.

2. Always treat snakes with great respect.

3. Do not trade with those who eat oranges.

4. Run away from brown eagles, for they are unholy.

5. Never hurt tortoises.