Flamafsas is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, idiotic beaver.

Flamafsas created carbon six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flamafsas, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Flamafsas, she will turn you into a sheep.

Flamafsas' most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Flamafsas' Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Flamafsas.

2. Always make sure there are no capybaras in a room before entering it.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Never talk about gravity.

5. Do not dye your hair white.