Getloptetti is a god.

He takes the form of a large, omniscient pigeon.

Getloptetti created energy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Getloptetti, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Getloptetti, he will be very sad.

Getloptetti's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Getloptetti's Holy Commandments

1. Cats are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Always treat hamsters with great respect.

4. Do not drink water in yellow rooms.

5. Never wear red shorts.