Afnabnil Dumveg is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, selfish elephant.

Afnabnil Dumveg created the Small Magellanic Cloud eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Afnabnil Dumveg, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Afnabnil Dumveg, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Afnabnil Dumveg's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Afnabnil Dumveg's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Afnabnil Dumveg.

2. Never think about asteroids.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Never paint your feet brown.

5. Do not take Afnabnil Dumveg's name in vain.