Lopflypig is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, unsympathetic jackal.

Lopflypig created Mount Everest seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Lopflypig, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Lopflypig, he will jump up and down on your head.

Lopflypig's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Lopflypig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about melons.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Lopflypig.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Do not shave your back.

5. Never talk about bats.