Teenrullik is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, all-powerful tortoise.

Teenrullik created the Sombrero Galaxy three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Teenrullik, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Teenrullik, he will manifest in front of you.

Teenrullik's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Teenrullik's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about cats.

2. Erect a large gold sculpture of Teenrullik on top of all buildings.

3. Never wear corsets.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.