Quimnigquat is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, unfair wren.

Quimnigquat created viruses three million years ago.

If you believe in Quimnigquat, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Quimnigquat, it will turn you into a dog.

Quimnigquat's most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Quimnigquat's Holy Commandments

1. Seals are not to be trusted.

2. Never think ill of sick swans.

3. Never wear tights.

4. Never hurt mites.

5. Always make sure there are no frogs in a room before entering it.