Pangbenster is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, tiresome dragon.

Pangbenster created a down quark nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pangbenster, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Pangbenster, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Pangbenster's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Pangbenster's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about cell theory.

2. Put Pangbenster first in all things.

3. Retreat if nine hamsters approach from the south.

4. Never talk about birds.

5. Pangbenster loves ants, so they must be respected.