Lanfitwit is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, compassionate mink.

Lanfitwit created a quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lanfitwit, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Lanfitwit, she will be mildly annoyed.

Lanfitwit's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Lanfitwit's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sharks in need.

2. Do not wear platinum on your body.

3. You must never eat gooseberries.

4. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.