Kadgofbus is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, happy cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Kadgofbus created dark matter eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Kadgofbus, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Kadgofbus, he will try to impress you with trees.

Kadgofbus' most sacred site is Poloka in Botswana.

Kadgofbus' Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Kadgofbus.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate gulls.

3. Do not shave your feet.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.