Hottagpad is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, vain whale.

Hottagpad created the planet Earth two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hottagpad, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Hottagpad, it will not care.

Hottagpad's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Hottagpad's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear jumpers.

2. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

3. Always wear gray.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Do not eat cherries.