Bifvonkcud Danflatmil Gonrotbep is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, moody capybara.

Bifvonkcud Danflatmil Gonrotbep created everything that exists two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bifvonkcud Danflatmil Gonrotbep, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Bifvonkcud Danflatmil Gonrotbep, he will attempt to scare you with floods.

Bifvonkcud Danflatmil Gonrotbep's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Bifvonkcud Danflatmil Gonrotbep's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick snakes.

2. You must never eat apples.

3. Never think about cell theory.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Do not sing in public.