Cephattompadfonhot is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, unjust slug.

Cephattompadfonhot created matter five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cephattompadfonhot, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Cephattompadfonhot, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Cephattompadfonhot's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Cephattompadfonhot's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Never paint your chest green.

3. Put Cephattompadfonhot first in all things.

4. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

5. Never look at nebulae.