Pangstikfat is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, egotistical sheep.

Pangstikfat created tapeworms three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pangstikfat, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Pangstikfat, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Pangstikfat's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Pangstikfat's Holy Commandments

1. Erect three tin sculptures of Pangstikfat on top of important buildings.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. Never think ill of sick pigs.

5. Never talk about fire.