Ranlarghap is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, stupid fish.

Ranlarghap created viruses two billion years ago.

If you believe in Ranlarghap, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Ranlarghap, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Ranlarghap's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Ranlarghap's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Run away if seven porpoises approach from the south.

4. Always make sure there are no squirrels in a building before entering it.

5. Do not trade with those who eat lemons.