Fitjadquimben is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, kind snail.

Fitjadquimben created water three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fitjadquimben, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Fitjadquimben, she will try to impress you with rainbows.

Fitjadquimben's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Fitjadquimben's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about gravity.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Never look at stars.

5. Do not take Fitjadquimben's name in vain.