Rapkembun is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, tiresome faun.

Rapkembun created a strange quark six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Rapkembun, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Rapkembun, she will turn you into a plant.

Rapkembun's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Rapkembun's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear stockings.

2. Always make sure there are no nematodes in a room before entering it.

3. Do not take Rapkembun's name in vain.

4. Fast once a month.

5. Respect your elders.