Quartsognadhamgub is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, quiet hydra.

Quartsognadhamgub created humankind three billion years ago.

If you believe in Quartsognadhamgub, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Quartsognadhamgub, it will destroy your home galaxy.

Quartsognadhamgub's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Quartsognadhamgub's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no porpoises in a building before entering it.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Hamsters are unholy and should not be approached.