Cebfaslen is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, awe-inspiring wolf.

Cebfaslen created a top quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cebfaslen, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Cebfaslen, she will be mildly annoyed.

Cebfaslen's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Cebfaslen's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Do not kill cats.