Sissitzen is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, smart ferret.

Sissitzen created a charm quark three million years ago.

If you believe in Sissitzen, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Sissitzen, he will destroy your home planet.

Sissitzen's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Sissitzen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill ducks.

2. Do not drink water in magenta rooms.

3. Do not jump in public.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Do not trade with those who eat apples.