Dutmabfab is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, competent eagle.

Dutmabfab created humanity six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dutmabfab, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Dutmabfab, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Dutmabfab's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Dutmabfab's Holy Commandments

1. Always help voles in need.

2. You must never eat lentils.

3. Dutmabfab loves frogs, so they must be respected.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Dutmabfab.

5. Do not stand on grass.