Fiddabxen is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, unsympathetic shrew.

Fiddabxen created the Andromeda Galaxy three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fiddabxen, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Fiddabxen, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Fiddabxen's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Fiddabxen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Run away from orange great tits, for they are unholy.

3. Never talk about asteroids.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.