Wityartdut is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, loving armadillo.

Wityartdut created the Whirlpool Galaxy eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Wityartdut, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Wityartdut, she will turn you into a rock.

Wityartdut's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Wityartdut's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Wityartdut's name in vain.

2. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

3. Hide if four hamsters approach from the east.

4. Always help squirrels in need.

5. Erect a large lead sculpture of Wityartdut on top of all buildings.