Hinyarsad is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, ill-tempered yak.

Hinyarsad created the planet Earth three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hinyarsad, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Hinyarsad, he will turn you into a snail.

Hinyarsad's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Hinyarsad's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about moons.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Never talk about gravity.

5. Fast once a month.