Yiknakgess is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, omniscient hedgehog.

Yiknakgess created viruses two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yiknakgess, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Yiknakgess, he will have a very low opinion of you.

Yiknakgess' most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Yiknakgess' Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never look at asteroids.

3. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate seals.

5. You must pray to Yiknakgess three times a day.