Damfutdob is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, stupid grasshopper.

Damfutdob created the planet Venus nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Damfutdob, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Damfutdob, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Damfutdob's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Damfutdob's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about asteroids.

2. Always wear gray.

3. Never feed lemons to doves while wearing yellow jumpers.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Do not commit murder.