Omtjonban is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, boastful bat.

Omtjonban created an atom six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Omtjonban, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Omtjonban, it will send minions to preach to you.

Omtjonban's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Omtjonban's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into green rooms.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.