Abfag is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, all-powerful swallow.

Abfag created a quark six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Abfag, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Abfag, she will turn you into a small brown duck.

Abfag's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Abfag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Abfag must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate badgers.