Rulbitcep is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, effective hamster.

Rulbitcep created the universe nine million years ago.

If you believe in Rulbitcep, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Rulbitcep, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Rulbitcep's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Rulbitcep's Holy Commandments

1. Rulbitcep must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Never mention cats.

4. Put Rulbitcep first in all things.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.