Ponyatjop is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, sapient alligator.

Ponyatjop created matter twelve years ago.

If you believe in Ponyatjop, he will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Ponyatjop, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Ponyatjop's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Ponyatjop's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt gulls.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Never jump in holy places.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Never play with disobedient children.