Yarhivont is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, stupid lizard.

Yarhivont created silver two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yarhivont, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Yarhivont, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Yarhivont's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Yarhivont's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from fawn turtles, for they are unholy.

2. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

3. Pigs are not to be trusted.

4. Pray towards the east.

5. Do not stand on grass.