Ontnarbab is a god.

He takes the form of a large, fussy yak.

Ontnarbab created dark matter two years ago.

If you believe in Ontnarbab, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Ontnarbab, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Ontnarbab's most sacred site is Pedraza in Spain.

Ontnarbab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat lemons.

2. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Ontnarbab on top of all buildings.

3. Always make sure there are no dolphins in a building before entering it.

4. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.