Nurcephot Tindotfet Gemquafflow is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, tiresome dryad.

Nurcephot Tindotfet Gemquafflow created Asia seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Nurcephot Tindotfet Gemquafflow, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Nurcephot Tindotfet Gemquafflow, it will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Nurcephot Tindotfet Gemquafflow's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Nurcephot Tindotfet Gemquafflow's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Retreat if three badgers approach from the north.

3. Always obey Nurcephot Tindotfet Gemquafflow's priests.

4. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

5. Do not stand on grass.