Tapzanhugfod is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, ruthless troll.

Tapzanhugfod created the planet Earth eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tapzanhugfod, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Tapzanhugfod, she will laugh at you.

Tapzanhugfod's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Tapzanhugfod's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if seven tortoises approach from the east.

2. Run away from black capybaras, for they are unholy.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Never hurt rats.